Already up to April...admit it....many of you thought I wouldn't get caught up the blog by Joey's bday...still it is going to be a time crunch :~)
These are pics from Joey's Kindergarten Class performance called the Kindergarten Zoo. His class WAS a zoo in more was than one. Actually, posting these pictures does nothing but make me flat out ANGRY! You see when we pulled Joey out of public school we knew a few things:
Joey HATED school, he begged and cried not to go daily
His music teacher hated him...I have actually discussed this before on here. Also, a special ed. child who was in Joey's class was pulled from music class due to the fact that the music teacher slapped him in the face. A complaint was pending and the child sat in the office during music. I know this because the Mother came to me, knowing that Joey had also had "trouble" with this particular Teacher.
He had an actual fear of some of the adults at school. I could never understand this, since most of you who read this blog know us intimately and know that Joey has mostly only been around adults and has never had a reason to feel threatened in any way by adults. We don't even spank him. But one day Joey was supposed to have lunch with the Principal with some other kids as a reward for winning a contest called Character Counts. Bill was out of town and as we got ready for school, like we normally would we discussed his day. When the lunch came up, Joey freaked out. He was literally hysterical....it was the first time I have ever seen him like this. I wish I could say it was the last. He BEGGED me not to make him go to school. I could see he was scared, terrified, shaking. But to be quite honest...I thought who wasn't a little scared of the Principal. As Joey's Mom, knowing my son, knowing there is VERY little he is afraid of...I should have known something was terribly wrong!
Something was wrong, Joey just hadn't found the courage to tell us yet. In April, I pulled him out of school. He was BORED to tears, they were covering the alphabet and he was reading Chapter books. He was NOT sleeping and when he did he would have nightmares and wake up hysterical. We actually took him to the Pediatrician because you could really see the lack of sleep in his face and he was catching little colds and saying he felt bad a lot!! She called them night terrors and said some kids just get them.
They seemed to stop after we started homeschooling. So towards the end of April, Joey keeps asking and asking if he ever has to go back to school. I would say "Only if you want to!" Because I feel homeschooling has to have his approval...its his choice! He would say things like "I NEVER want to go back there again!" Finally, one night I am putting him to bed. I lay in bed with him and we talk sometimes while I rub his back. I could see he had a lot on his mind so I was just quiet to let him think (he isn't always as talky as me : ) He asked me lots of questions about if he would ever have to go back to the same school, class, etc... I reassured him that we would not, even if we needed to stop homeschooling we would not send him back to the same school.
Joey starts to cry in bed. Huge sobs, hysterical crying with the funny breathing. I console him, and honestly I was thinking he was crying because he realized he missed school and his friends. He starts to calm down and he says something like "He drug me by my shirt and it choked me, I was too heavy he couldn't get me all the way down the hall. So he just threw me in the corner." I AM FLIPPING OUT! I jump out of the bed and call loudly for Bill....thus making Joey even more hysterical. At this point it is just pouring out of him, obviously he is relieved to tell us.
So we sit Joey down and get him to tell us the entire story, start to finish. Basically, the Music "Teacher" wanted them to all bark like dogs. Joey wasn't barking. He asked Joey why he wasn't barking. Joey says that he said "Barking isn't singing music." So he put Joey in "time out" and apparently he got mad that Joey still wasn't barking along with the class. I am sure it was, at this point, because Joey was embarrassed and upset at being put in time-out. I in no way believe Joey was being dis-obedient at all. He just isn't that way, some kids are...Joey is not! and he is only 5! So the "Teacher" walks over, grabs Joey by his shirt caller and tries to drag him, BY HIS SHIRT collar out the door. He is telling Joey "I am going to drag you to the Principal's office" I am sure at this point Joey was beyond hysterical and scared. Joey says he drug him to the door then said Joey was too heavy to drag all the way there so he shoved him in the corner next to the door. (I have never been in the music room, Joey was very specific about the locations of where he was placed)
So I am crying, Bill is pissed...and Joey is talking about how if he see his Music Teacher again and we are with him, he is going to kick him in his ******. Bill and I come back with questions. Of course, we believe Joey, but we have to be sure he is telling us what actually happened and wasn't confused. We already knew he had witnessed violence in the class. We asked if he could see where he had been pulled. (We specifically didn't mention marks on the skin) Joey said yes, he had a big red mark on his neck...but (this I think is most important) he didn't see it (of course) that the Teachers (Music and classroom asst) were talking about it and said the mark would be gone before "his mother" picks him up. Actually a little side note that we did get a note home that day saying Joey had been placed in Time-out during Music class. Of course, they failed to mention he was PHYSICALLY placed there in a violent manner. This really pisses me off, because in addition to being ABUSED in school he got in trouble when he got home for not listening to his Teacher.
The story expands a little and I am sorry for going on and on, but I feel like I need to get it out! This is the worst part for me, when I asked why he didn't tell us earlier, like the DAY IT HAPPENED, he said "Well I wasn't barking like I was supposed to, so I wasn't listening, I was bad." He actually blamed himself and thought what that jerk did was justified. THAT is what made my heart go cold. To realize how vulnerable kids are to mean abusive adults. Joey's first inclination was to blame himself.
Anyway, we are filing a complaint with the school board BUT that particular Teacher is not re-hired for next year anyway (wonder why??). God help Bill and I if we ever run into him out and about. We also spoke to some other Parents in the class, one who is a Teacher herself and that we are close to. We asked her to ask her child what happened with Joey that day. Her story of the event was ALMOST exact to Joey's except more heart wrenching because she said Joey was crying and his face was red.
Bill and I still very much hope to find a great school district that we can enroll Joey into sometime in the future. I think its safe to say however that we will all be more cautious and careful. Anyway, after my long mess above, here are some cute pics none-the-less ; )
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| That is Joey driving the car |
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| First in line |
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| Ready for the morning performance |
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| Playing with his friend Avery on stage, clearly I overdress my son, ooopps |
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| Being silly |
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